A few weeks ago, I wrote a blog post about how fear can trap you. But Friday, I embarked on a life journey - an experience I will never forget. I flew in an airplane for the very first time. It may not be very significant for others, but for me, it is huge! I had always aid I'd never fly. I'm scared of heights, and I get vertigo. But, it was more than that, that bothered me about flying. I feared dying.
Being afraid of dying has always been a terrible fear of mine. Some nights, it was so bad that I didn't want to fall asleep because I was afraid I wouldn't wake up, or worse, my nieces would climb the stairs and find me dead.
Satan had gotten a foothold in and wouldn't let me go. I would lie in bed at night, crying myself to sleep, and praying that God would let me see another day.
A preacher once said to our congregation, "Why should the devil threaten you with Heaven?" Logically, I know that when I die, I'll be in Heaven, but at times, I fear death. I want to live a long life, see my dreams through, have a family of my own. I'm not ready to go to Heaven.
I feel guilty for that thought. Is it wrong to feel that way? I hope not, and I feel like God understands that I'm only human. That I fear death and the unknown.
And life after death is unknown. I know I'm going to live with my Heavenly father, but what will that be like? Will I know my family? I don't want to forget them. I can't even fathom that. I don't want to understand what that would be like.
The devil is good about using death against us. But, God says that we shouldn't fear death. Romans 8:14,15 NKJV says, "For as many as are led by the Spirit of God, these are sons of God. For you did not receive
the spirit of bondage again to fear, but you received the Spirit of
adoption by whom we cry out, “Abba, Father.”
God isn't the One who gave us the fear of Death or fear of any kind. That is the work of the Devil. So why should we allow the devil to threaten us with the best thing that could possibly ever happen to us?
There are no tears and sorrow in Heaven. If we did die and leave our families behind, God isn't going to let us be sad over it. So, why on earth should we fear it now? The simple answer is that we shouldn't. God didn't give us a spirit of fear but of understanding. We may not "understand" death and what is to come, but we shouldn't fear living with our Creator.
I still struggle with this, but I'm getting better about it. With God, I can do anything and survive anything.